Chapter 7: Obedience

The angel sat cross-legged on the ground playing a golden flute. Her hair was a rich auburn and plaited into seven large loops that were interlaced with gold. She wore a gossamer, green under tunic bound with a golden girdle, and a cloak with long sleeves, which was also green.

Within the sleeves of the outer garment were oversized pockets containing all manner of instruments used in the artsall of gold. There were various musical instruments, paint brushes, musical scores, ballet shoes, a quill pen-all within the sleeves.

Her neck and hands had a slight tint of gold and so did the small portion of her bare feet that I could see.

Secured around her head was a golden cord; in the center of the cord was a small golden box. The box was in the middle of her forehead and similar to a frontlet for the housing of Scripture.

Eventually she lowered the flute and opened her eyes peacefully, as one might who is still rapt in contemplation. Then turning her face toward me, she smiled. "Praise Him," she said. Her voice was gentle and melodious, and her eyes a limpid green.

I was too disquieted in spirit to share her peace, for thoughts were racing through my mind-with no resolution.

The Angel Judy

She smiled again, knowingly this time, but did not address my private conflict. "I am Judy," she said, "one who praises."

"Hello, Judy," I said without much enthusiasm, "I am Anna."

"I know who you are," she smiled, "for I am assigned to you to assist you in praise of our God."

"Assigned to me for praise?" I asked. Then excitedly I gestured toward the space in midair, "I saw..."

"Yes," she said, "angels traveling on praise."

"Traveling on praise?"

"Yes," she reiterated, placing the flute into one of her oversized pockets.

"I do not understand."

"Praise has in it part of the heart and part of the spirit sent forth, and so it is tangible to us in this world of true light, life, and spirit. To us here, praise is as substantive as a trolley on earth, you might say. You join yourself to it, and it will carry you along.

It can take you for a ride," she laughed liltingly, "and the one joined to it adds to it."

I turned my eyes to look out over the valley. How could this be? I questioned within myself. Then I began to think, Yes, yes, I can understand that. I know that f someone leads worship with an anointing on earth, it can lift you in spirit to that person's level of praise. The other's anointing carries you with it, and you add your voice to the worship being raised to God. Yes, I can see that.

"Since all such praise travels to the Father," she continued, "it is like catching a ride on a passing trolley and enjoying the ride to the throne room. If the angels do not ride all the way there, still they have added an imprint to the praise. Therefore, they too have participated, if ever so briefly."

The sound of a single violin began to pass by. The violin was playing a tender, unaccompanied melody. A single angel was traveling with the adoration being expressed through this instrument and was adding to it.

"Some praise on earth is like a quiet stream, as is this," she smiled.

From a distance I could hear the sound of many voices singing. The sound was moving swiftly in our direction.

"Some worship is like a tidal wave," she said. "All of it gives to the angels a joy they would not have if mankind did not lift up praises to God."

The sound was coming more quickly now, rolling toward us. As it drew nearer, I could sense my spirit rising to join such exalted worship. It lifted us spontaneously to our feet. Judy raised her hands, tilted her head back, and joined the song:

Angels in their glory

Can never touch the flame,

The fire, pure incandescence,

That burns within Your name.

Let them gaze in wonder,

In awe, as they proclaim:

"Holy God, though ever new,

Eternally the same."

Frightened, frozen, fettered.

Those who seek to fight,

Numbed and gnawed and naked,

Those who choose the night.

But we are covered by His love,

Beneath His banner stand,

Hidden in the Rock above,

Sheltered by His hand.

Angels in their glory

Can never touch the flame,

The fire, pure incandescence,

That burns within Your name.

Let them gaze in wonder,

In awe, as they proclaim:

"Holy God, though ever new,

Eternally the same."

In an ecstasy of devotion, Judy rose into the air from her place on the hill and began to move toward the passing praise.

"Take the path to find the Lord," she called, and she was swept along in the tidal wave of worship surging toward the throne.

The disappearing praise continued to engage my spirit. Finally I opened my eyes and realized that she had given me the answer I needed. I hurried down the hill to the path and began running in the direction of the vanishing praise.

Obedience

As I hastened, I heard the voice of Jesus say very clearly, "Obedience, Anna."

I stopped in my tracks.

He continued, "I delight to show you your heavenly home, but for your safety, you must be trained in obedience. There are grave dangers. All doors to the enemy must be shut."

As I stood in wonder at the gravity of what He had said, an angel appeared on the path beside me.

The angel began talking to me as though he were continuing some conversation we had already begun, gesturing with his hand toward God's park. "All of this is for the children of God, but you, Anna, have chosen to eat from the hand of God. You must love your Father enough to choose obedience rather than gratifications on earth. Choose Him minute by minute. You are careless with His gifts, and you are careless with His love for you."

His over familiarity stunned me, as well as his knowledge of a decision I had only recently made; but yes, I was careless. As the Lord had drawn me into a deeper walk with Him, those things permissible a year or even a month ago were now no longer allowable. Somehow I could no longer get by with them, but I still lapsed into many of these faults.

The Thought Life

Elusive sins caused me to pay a high price in my relationship with the Lord. I thought to myself, Let the wicked forsake his way and the unrighteous man his thoughts." I had moved from the "way" category to the "thoughts." My mind did not focus on unforgiveness or covetousness or such obvious sins.

My sins now were in engaging my mind in some area where I was not called, or in letting my mind dwell on the past, or in making a judgment that was out of my boundary of responsibility.

My life had become very constrained indeed. If I walked without turning to the right or the left, I remained in the flow of God's grace. Any thoughts that were "vain in their imaginations" caused my mind to run in grooves around a track. Such thoughts were driven by tormentors it seemed. But I found that I could stop them by repeatedly catching myself and halting the train of thought as I began to think on such vain thoughts.

Of course, these thoughts would tiptoe back in, needing to be run out time and time again. Therefore I was halting them and throwing them out, standing against them with my will, as if my shoulder were against the door of access.

Still I was careless, as he had said, and was mentally running around many tracks in torment and weariness until each thought was taken captive to Christ. Earlier in my life with Christ, my mind could usually do as it pleased, but not now.

Narrow and narrower was the way, but in this obedience to

His Word was life.

The Angel Shama

Without missing a beat, the angel on the path beside me said, "I am Shama."

I saw no reason to give my name, for he seemed to know almost as much about me as I did myself.

"Shall we walk?" he continued.

Almost stumbling, I moved forward.

He had long, straight, silver hair that was caught at the base of his head and hung down his back. He was very muscular, and although his hair was silver, he looked perhaps forty. He wore a full-length white robe, which looked as though it had been stained with blood or the juice of red grapes. This stain was on the hem of the robe and on the cuffs of the long sleeves, discoloring the garment to the knees and elbows.

"You delight in God," he continued. "I have watched you and have seen that you desire nearness to Him. However, do you not know that disobedience creates a wall between you and Him. It is a wall of your own making because you cannot curb your natural desires. He will replace with Himself every delight you push away, Anna." In looking at me, his eyes caught sight of a hill slightly beyond us. "Come with me," he said.

As we walked up the hill, he continued, "There is a type of suffering in obedience, but the rewards far, far outweigh the pain."

The Prototypes Above

From the top of the hill, we could see a broad plain below.

Herds of various kinds of creatures were grazing; among them were prehistoric animals.

My hands went to my face in amazement.

"Heaven itself is like an ark, Anna," he said. "These animals do not have resurrected bodies but were part of the heavenly kingdom before the earth was created."

"Magnificent," I whispered.

"Aren't they?" he said, observing the scene. Then, almost with a sigh, he continued, "Let's return to the path." He was slightly ahead of me going down the hill, and he assisted me with the incline.

"Do you have hair?" I asked him.

"It looks like hair:' he said. "We are creatures of light. We are spirit, Anna. We are not flesh and blood as humans are. Some of us in service to the King look like humans, but some do not."

We returned to the path and continued to walk. "We can change our appearance," the angel said, "whereas you cannot. We are known by the essence of what we are, not by our outward appearance. On earth this is often reversed, is it not? Humans often dwell upon appearances."

"You seem to know me," I queried.

"I know you better than you know me," the angel laughed.

The Stained Robe

"Why is your robe stained at the bottom and on the sleeves?"

"I am called to assist in child training-the kind that squeezes the child-like being in a wine press. These," he looked down at the stains, "are visible signs of the child's development. The more stains, the greater the work has progressed within the child.

Obedience is not learned easily, Anna. Some on earth never learn it."

"Are you an angel assigned to help train me?" I asked.

"I am assigned to you."

"Helping to train people in obedience cannot be a pleasant job."

The angel replied, "It is of great significance to the Father and absolutely necessary. By this time in your life, my robe should be entirely stained and my face and hands dripping, but there are only stains on the hem and sleeves. So may I suggest that you are hindering your growth through known disobedience. Immediate gratification can never replace serving the Lord with a whole heart. Such obedience releases joys untold."

Repentance

I looked out over the landscape, letting the truths he was sharing work within me. "I have sinned," I said quietly. I did not wish to seem glib, but I did wish to show a willingness to repent promptly. "I ask the Lord to forgive me."

He put his arm around my shoulder and jostled me, as a coach might a football player. "And you know He does. This is a good day for new beginnings," he smiled. Then he removed his arm and looked ahead solemnly.

"I thank you for your patience and for helping me. I can see you are a powerful angel. If you were a human, I would say you 'worked out."

"We do 'work out," he laughed heartily, "but our workout comes from wrestling with humans. I look as I do because you have given me so much resistance through your flesh. So' he laughed, "you might say I do 'work out. I would suggest that you turn this very day so that my workout is less strenuous. Delight yourself in God, Anna, and reduce my exercise program," he smiled.

Then he sobered rapidly. "Nothing, no one can compare to Him," he said. "Speaking for those of us who are assigned to you," he continued haltingly, almost as if he was going to reveal something deeply personal, "we would like to get a little closer to God." He almost stammered, "If it were only us, we would; but much depends upon you concerning that." He seemed so embarrassed by what he had said that he vanished.

The Eagle Returns

Before I could puzzle over what he meant, I saw the white Eagle fly across the path. My heart leaped when I saw Him. I began to run after Him, calling, "Lord! Lord, please come back, please."

He must have heard me, for He made a wide bank in flight and landed before me. I was so overjoyed to see Him whom my heart adores that I hugged Him around the neck, clinging to Him. "I want to fly with You. I want to eat from the hand of God."

He became the Lord. I buried my face in His shoulder. He held me, returning my embrace, more like a lover than a friend. This amazed me. Did He long for me as I longed for Him?

"Forgive me, Lord," I said. "I want to be with You. I long for You. I want to be and do whatever You want, as long as we are together."

"Anna," He said, pulling me away from Him so that He could look into my eyes, "do you trust Me?"

"Why, yes, Lord," I answered, surprised.

"Then come."

He became the white Eagle. I quickly climbed onto His back, and He began to fly. I put my arms around His neck and buried my face in the fragrant feathers of His head.

He flew... and flew... and flew... until He flew into deep darkness.